By the time Jane left me, I became totally confused.

‘How did I let myself into this?’ I asked for the umpteenth time. Suddenly an idea crept in that Johnson would have a solution. I quickly left the shop without even telling my sales persons that I was going out. On getting to Johnson’s boutique, I rushed in and everyone was startled.

“Guy, are you alright? What is after you?” Johnson asked as he took me to his office.

“Johnson there is fire on the mountain; I’m in deep trouble.”

“What exactly is the problem” He asked, sounding so concerned.

“Jane is pregnant.” I cried out.

“Wow! congrats. That means you will soon be a father,” Johnson said sarcastically.
Johnson’s reaction got me very angry and I rebuked him for it.

“Johnson you disappoint me. If you were small boy, I would have spanked you. How could you be joking with something as serious as this?”

“Come off it, my friend, you are fretting over nothing. Are you the first to impregnate a lady? Anyway, what is your plan?”

“That is why I am here. I need your advice.”

Johnson studied me for a while and then asked if I would want to marry Jane.

“Of course, I have to marry her. Do I have choice? Though, Jane is not the kind of girl I would have wished to spend the rest of my life with. The worst is that I have this feeling that she has been pretending to be humble. She has started showing her true colours. Jane threatened to report me to pastor.”

“Kel, those things you are saying are not the issue. I will advise that you call Pastor on phone and schedule for an appointment to see him. Delay is dangerous at this stage.”

“Thank you so much my brother. What will I have done without you?”

The wedding date that was getting close. Another was getting Mummy to bless our union. I took Jane to Mummy’s house for introduction.

“Mummy you have been advising me to get a wife. I prayed about it and finally, God has given me someone. I brought her to show you, her name is Jane.”

I have been with Mummy long enough to understand her moods. I could tell that she was not impressed with my choice of wife. All the same, she welcomed Jane with a smile.

“My daughter you are welcome.”

After welcoming her, a question and answer section followed in quick succession. As Jane was answering the questions, Mummy was studying her closely.

“Are you a Christian?”

“Yes ma.”

“Which church do you fellowship with?”

“I worship in any available church. Though, I planned to join your son in his church after our wedding.”

I nodded in affirmative when she said that. As far as I was concerned, that is the only reasonable point she had made.

“When did you know my son?”

“Ma, I have known him for about 3 years now. In fact…”

I attempted to cut in before Jane embarrasses me. However, Mummy was smarter so, she shut me up.

“Son, hold you peace. Allow me to discuss with my daughter in-law. Back to you my daughter, please can you complete your statement?”

“Thanks ma. I was trying to tell you that I and Kel have been dating for about 3 years.”

“That’s nice. Congrats to both of you,” Mummy said with a bitter smile.

I needed no one to tell me that I had shot myself on both legs. I was shifting uncomfortably on the chair and sweating profusely not withstanding that the air conditioner was on.

‘I never knew that Jane is clueless and stupid,’ I thought to myself.

At that point, Chika, who had been all smiles since I introduced Jane to them, informed us that the table was set. I could barely touch the food because my mind was heavy with guilt. The worse was that as I looked at Mummy intermittently, I could see worry and disappointment written on her face. Jane was busy swallowing the food and water as if she just concluded 3 days dry fasting. After eating the food, she complimented Mummy.

“Thank you for the food ma. You are such a wonderful cook.”

“You are welcome dear. Though, it was my daughter that prepared the food.”

“Mummy, please I need to see Jane off now, she has another appointment to catch up with.”

I said that because I needed an excuse to go out. I could no longer stand Mummy’s presence. Another is to prevent Jane from adding salt to the injury I had already sustained.

“It’s alright. After seeing her off, come back. It’s been long we talked.”

I was fuming with anger as we moved aside. Then, I confronted Jane.

“What nonsense were you babbling inside there? I never knew that you are just an over grown baby. I should have taken time to teach you word for word, what to answer when questions are thrown at you. Notwithstanding that I told you the kind of woman we were going to meet, you got there and messed the whole thing up. Imagine you telling my mum that I have been dating you for three years. Do you realize the psychological effect that will have on her. I am so disappointed.”

“Enough of that!” Jane barked. “Do you think that I’m a fool?”

I was shocked but I managed to find my voice.

“Jane, is it me you are talking to like that. You are shouting at me.”

“Yes Kel, it is you. Will you beat me? Go ahead, beat me and show the world that you are coward. Listen to me, the time of playing the fool for you is over. After all I am carrying your child so you ought to treat me with some level of respect. You want to push me into telling lies that will backfire on me. I should tell your mum that I knew you yesterday, so you can easily deny the pregnancy. Never! In fact, I am out of here.”

“Are you walking out on me? Jane, come back here. You are still going. We shall see!” I threatened but that did not make her to come back.

I turned and reluctantly dragged myself back to Mummy’s apartment. She was seated, waiting for me.

“Kelvin, Kelvin, Kelvin. How many times did I call you?”

“Three times.”

“How well do you know that girl you brought here?”

“I know her well Mum,” I answered in whispers.

“You know her well. Anyway I need to inform you, if you not already aware. That girl you brought here is pregnant. It is showing all over her. She is nothing less than 3 months pregnant. Did you notice the way she was eating as if she has never seen food before. She finished hers, ate yours and was stylishly demanding for more.”

A sudden hush fell on me and I bowed my head even as tears shed from my eyes.

Mummy paused for a while and continued amidst sobs.

“Kelvin, I warned you never to bring shame to me. Let it not be that you are responsible for that pregnancy.”

With that, Mummy left me and entered into the room. I stood but could not move. I was transfixed at a point.

“Kelvin, you have killed yourself,” I muttered.